I learned a few things this last week… the first being do not grocery shop when you’re fasting. It started me on a thinking about food and made it difficult to stay focused on God and I got hungry 🤤
I also learned that when I put everything in my grocery pickup order, I shopped like I would for a long week of eating instead of one day of easing back into eating, two days of eating keto and one day of easing back into fasting. Really didn’t need the quantity of food I purchased. Why did I get so much food?
Because I turned my eyes 👀 back toward food and away from God. Thankfully I didn’t eat a week’s worth of food this past weekend… for a bit though I did feel like I was looking at God through a tunnel.
I didn’t realize this until the last day or so and now I’m thankful that I learned this. I know where some of these patterns came from. Digging deeper: I always want to make sure there’s enough food: even though I have never gone without food, never gone to bed because we didn’t have enough. Generational patterns are part of it, but not all of it. Food has been a comfort to me and a sign that everything is going to be okay- even if it’s not.
God showed me something patiently and with love. We use other things in our life to make us feel safe or comfortable, to help us feel like we are successful or independent. But a healthier way of looking at food is with the thanksgiving that I had when breaking my fast the first week.
So today as I prepare to start fasting again, I enter in with thanksgiving in my heart. My last meal and snacks will be filled with an attitude of thanks for the nourishment.
I just wanted to share what happened to me so easily. Anything can take our focus off of our connection with God. What things distract you from God or what things make you feel safe? I’m learning to push in to my intimacy with God like never before and I’m thankful for every minute of these lessons 🥰