Anxiety
Tossing and turning most of the night, it feels like recordings are flashing through me. Stuck in the wonder of the what if this happens or how this will play out in the near future/ it’s feeling like I can’t shut off my mind. Over and over I battle thinking I’m strong enough to overcome these thoughts that plague me during the night when what I truly need is sleep.
Sleepless nights
To get the sleep I need, I need peace but it feels like the anxiety and fear overwhelm me . I know from experience that even if I manage to doze off, the fear will follow me into my sleep and encompass my dreams.. leaving me waking with more of the same thoughts and an exhaustion that is hard to break through.
Years of anxiety became a familiar part of me
I battled this anxiety for years before realizing that it is anxiety and not just my personality. Not just who I am. that’s how long I’ve had to deal with those thoughts and feelings but it wasn’t until the last five years or so that I actually was able to identity these experiences as “anxiety”.
Testimony!
The good news is that I no longer need anxiety medication and I’ve had revelation that anxiety is not who I am. I was caught up in lies that anxiety was a normal component of my personality trait and that there wasn’t anything I could do about it.
Back off Satan
Did Satan intentionally attach anxiety to me in whatever form to bring me down and prevent me from walking in peace? You bet he did but he didn’t win and he won’t win.
My original design
Fortunately, I am learning through conversations with God that I wasn’t designed to be plagued with anxiety. That anxiety attached itself to me and I didn’t do anything about it spiritually because I simply didn’t know.
Oh what does the Bible say?
Funny thing is that the instructions are in the Bible, concise and clear. Ready for the step by step passages?
“Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
Philippians 4:4, 6 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/php.4.6.NIV
So our first step is to rejoice because when our hearts are completely caught up in rejoice and thanksgiving, it makes it harder for anxiety to creep in.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
Philippians 4:6 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/php.4.6.NIV
Ok I full on believe the scripture in verse 6 applies to anxiety and fear. My anxiety, yours. Your neighbor’s anxiety or your spouse’s. It’s obvious right? So why did I miss this for so long after being raised in the church since I was born? First, I missed it because I didn’t know I had anxiety. Even when I had thoughts that what I was going through was anxiety, it’s like my mind was in denial and refused to settle on it. (A big layer of deception that I was sold on).
Then, I bought into a lie that those anxious and fearful feelings were who I am. Why would I believe that? Who knows which of my scars or insecurities played into the hands of the deceiver (Satan). If this battle I’ve gone through resonates with just one person then I want to share my journey with the hope that it leads to people being FREE!
Prescriptions didn’t help
Things at work a few years ago were really tense and the fear and stress inside me escalated. I finally realized I had anxiety, so I went to the doctors for help and took pill after pill trying to find the solution. Guess what? The mind is a powerful thing and it takes quite a combo to alleviate anxiety and fears. At one point I was on three different prescriptions at the same time to combat the anxiety and still wasn’t getting the relief I needed.
Multiple anxiety drugs later, I still feel that this anxiety tries to reattach itself to me, but this time I’m empowered with a knowledge I’m more than willing to share!
“And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:7 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/php.4.7.NIV
Wow there’s nothing like coming to God realizing how off track I’ve gotten to give me that humble realization of His never ending LOVE. I can’t remember the exact moment of His revelation to me, but it was before I moved to anther state and started another job. It showed me that God meets us right where we are at- we don’t have to make our life perfect to walk in His peace and grace.
When I laid everything at God’s feet I felt he told me not to pick it up again. That’s not to say that it’s always easy to remember His words to us about anxiety and peace… Sometimes it is surprisingly easy to walk in peace. Sometimes, I do feel those old feelings trying to creep back into my life. When I realize this is happening I start praying out loud and reciting the following verses to remind me of who I am and what helps me walk in sweet blessed peace:
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
Philippians 4:8 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/php.4.8.NIV
“Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”
Philippians 4:9 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/php.4.9.NIV
When those thoughts start rolling around in my head, as soon as I recognize them I start praying. I thank God and rejoice in what I have- I ask Holy Spirit to guide my thoughts. I also tell Satan to back off, I’ve been cleared by the Supreme Creator of all anxiety and nothing can attach to me.
Then, I put into practice exactly as the scripture says, thinking (meditating, praying over, being thankful for) only on the things that are true, pure, right, noble, admirable, excellent or praiseworthy. Then, if I need to, I will make a list of all those things and my reward is simply walking and living in a peace so perfect that God designed it just it for me…. And for you!
Questions for discussion:
Do you believe that Satan comes after us in the area of anxiety?
What are the areas in your life that you rejoice in? What is an area that is harder to rejoice in?
Do you feel that there is a stigma of shame within Christianity for those that have dealt with anxiety?
Prayer
My prayer today is that you will see you were created and designed by someone who loves you so much. God never intends for us to be plagued with fear and anxiety, if this is something you’re dealing with or can relate to, my prayer is that you are immediately set free by the Holy Spirit. Maybe you’re the voice standing for someone you care about, standing for their journey from anxiety into peace. I agree with you in prayer that your someone is also set free and led to the freedom that exists in God’s peace. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.
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